Bolo Ties and Boots

Drew #27
Published on
Nov 12, 2020
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In this episode...

This week, Doug and Meredith are back at it to kick off Season 2 with Andrew. Doug talks about his road trip into the mountains of Colorado while Meredith talks about the trials and tribulations of her vegetable garden. In the session, Drew recognizes some familiar patterns of behavior with his mom while his brother’s wedding is fast approaching. Drew and Doug talk about feeling even keeled and they explore the meaning behind the phrase “It’s ok to be alone but not ok to be lonely.” In the breakdown, Meredith and Doug examine some of Drew’s patterns that are playing out with his mom and how it’s influenced some behaviors in his own interpersonal relationships.


Kenzie Jenest
Bonnie Rae

Bonnie is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in Los Angeles. She is an instructor for graduate students in the LGBT Specialization Psychology program at Antioch University. Although her specialty is working with the LGBTQ community and people in the entertainment industry, she also assists clients in managing and/or overcoming anxiety, depression, trauma, stress, painful relationship patterns, creative blocks, co-dependency, love and sex addiction, issues with intimacy and low self-esteem.

Bonnie received a Bachelor of Fine Arts degree from Emerson College and a Masters in Clinical Psychology degree from Antioch University with a specialization in LGBT psychology.

Doug Friedman

Doug Friedman is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker that has spent nearly 20 years working with adults, adolescents and families with issues ranging from depression and anxiety to substance abuse, bipolar disorder and PTSD. He has supervised a program at a community mental health agency that serves severely emotionally disturbed youth and their families in Los Angeles. He continues to provide clinical supervision to therapists and associates in his private group practice, Clear Mind Full Heart in Los Angeles.

Doug received a Masters in Social Work from The Catholic University of America and a BA in Study of Religion from UCLA. Before becoming a psychotherapist, Doug worked for a music management company that oversaw bands like Nirvana, Foo Fighters, Beastie Boys, and Bonnie Raitt. Doug is also the artist and songwriter behind all the music heard on the podcast.

Meredith Levy

Meredith Levy is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in the state of California and holds a Master’s Degree in Clinical Psychology from Antioch University. Over the last ten years she has worked with many different populations, and feels most at home working in addiction, personality disorders and mood disorders. Meredith specializes in Dialectical
Behavioral Therapy (DBT). Meredith worked with inner-city youth as a bi-lingual therapist for the Department of Mental Health in Los Angeles County. Not only has Meredith worked at a variety of different drug and alcohol treatment centers throughout California, she was also the co- founder of a large treatment facility in Northern California.

Meredith's extensive education and background as an attorney and an MBA gives her a unique perspective and a fresh approach to elevating personal growth. In addition, she is a certified yoga instructor and believes that the spiritual, physical and emotional aspects of the self are important components of the therapeutic process.

Key Takeaways

[0:32] Doug and Meredith are back at it and kicking off Season 2, woo-hoo! Doug talks about his road trip into the mountains of Colorado.

[4:41] Meredith talks about her tending her vegetable garden and Doug recalls how Franklin helped ward off coyotes in his front yard.

[9:02] Meredith laments daylight savings time but loves seeing stars in the sky. 

[12:25] Doug and Meredith catch us up on some highlights of Season 1 with Drew - his constant night terrors, the trauma around Mom’s overdoses, some relationship issues including a recent breakup, and his estranged brother’s bachelor party.

[15:31] Session begins

Doug and Drew start with brother’s wedding coming up and his mom wanting him to attend. Drew and Doug look at how his mom has a history of buying him gifts to get him to a happy place when something unpleasant comes up.

[19:10] Drew recognizes that he wants to go to the wedding for his own reasons, not because mom bribed him with gifts or because he has an obligation to go. 

[20:01] Drew and Doug examine the meaning behind the phrase “It’s ok to be alone but not ok to be lonely.” What makes you feel uncomfortable? 

[23:56] This time of year triggers Drew’s fear about mom not doing well and feeling suicidal again. Doug helps Drew express his own vulnerable feelings that are coming up.

[30:12] Drew makes connections with the feelings coming up in session to his relationship patterns with both people and with money.

[35:28] Doug and Drew look at how old versions of ourselves need to leave in order to evolve with new versions of yourself. 

[42:33] Session ends. Breakdown begins

Meredith and Doug examine some of the patterns coming out with his mom (buying gifts) and how it’s influenced some behaviors in his own interpersonal relationships.

[49:23] Meredith notes that Drew’s well-being doesn’t depend on his mom, but it is impacted by her.

[52:09] Doug and Meredith talk about “living within your means” and the concept of instant gratification.

[54:45] Meredith has an epiphany about uncomfortable emotions when they discuss the idea of being alone versus feeling lonely.

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